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不是冤家不聚头

bú shì yuān jiā bú jù tóu
Fated enemies are bound to meet.

Not be enemies, not gather heads

This means that people who have intense conflicts with each ...

This means that people who have intense conflicts with each other are often destined to cross paths repeatedly, as if by fate. It can also be used playfully to describe a couple who bickers constantly but is clearly meant to be together.

The concept of 'yuān jia' (冤家) combines the idea of a foe and a lover — someone with whom you have a karmic entanglement. In Chinese literature and opera, this is a common trope.

Someone might say this when two colleagues who can't stand each other keep getting assigned to the same team, or when a married couple argues all the time but clearly loves each other deeply.

This saying helps Chinese people make sense of persistent, unavoidable conflicts by attributing them to fate rather than personal failure. It signals a philosophical acceptance of difficult relationships and even finds humor in them.

#relationships #karma #humor

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